Rabia Mayet | rabiamayet@radioislam.co.za

12 March 2025

4-minute read

The role of a woman is a complex one. To balance the madness of the outside world with kindness and care within the home, attorney, author and writer of legal columns, Mariam Tiladia says that it is essential to bring the traditional framework into this era.

The traditional role of women was to focus on the needs of her family. Nowadays, women multi-task, alternating between the work environment and the home. Added to that is the impact of social media, not always a positive one. Mariam says that “each women is going through a different challenge” and “we cannot compare our lives to somebody else.”

Scholars have always advocated for a “balanced and spiritually enriching home environment,” as women play a key role in “nurturing, guiding and educating” their children, both physically and spiritually. A women’s role goes beyond domestic chores to shape coming generations and contribute to “the moral fabric of our society.” But a mother can only give emotional support to her family if she takes time for herself by connecting with Allah through dua, and by not neglecting herself through self-care.

A happy home filled with peace and tranquillity is the best gift parents can give to their children, and this can only be established with mutual understanding between mums and dads. Rahmah or mercy between spouses encourages empathy over ego, and care within the marital framework, which then extends to the children. Shura or mutual consultation involving deep discussions enhances communication within the family, providing for stability and combatting conflict in families. Shura “cultivates a team” instead of an opposition, which is an important component for harmony within the home. Parents need to be on the same page and shift their focus to connecting with Allah SWT and engaging in dua when faced with challenges or personal depression. Good communication results in amicable resolutions, says Mariam.

Mothers are affected by psychological impressions of trying to do it all. Intention is crucial during Ramadhaan when maximising on the performance of good deeds, doing acts of charity, heightened prayer and communal gatherings can increase morals. While the perception of fasting is different for every woman, fasting promotes self-awareness and can foster harmony in the home.

Mariam shared these tips to navigate Ramadhaan with harmony:

1. Plan ahead.
2. Create a schedule for your Ramadhaan for salaah, Quran and household routines to minimise tension and stress.
3. Take time out for yourself.
4. Establish a quiet hour for the family to read, relax, pray salaah or engage in zikr together.
5. Make dua together at iftaar to create a bonding experience.
6. Read books with Quran stories or hadith to little kids.
7. Get older kids to help with chores, as interaction leads to easy communication.
8. Teens can replace screen time with study time or get involved in artwork.
9. Start practicing gratitude – make our children aware of the current living standards of Muslims in Palestine, Syria and other regions.
10. Get kids of all ages involved in acts of charity.

To activate the creative side of the mind, Mariam suggests getting a copy of her book The Heartily Inspirations colouring book. The book is designed to “connect the readers to Allah, reduce stress, and relax the mind.” It contains inspirational quotes and abstract art activities to spiritually uplift, leading to peace and harmony within oneself.

Listen to the full interview with Faaiza Munshi on New Horizons.