Understanding Low Self-Worth
How to Build Self-Worth in Teenagers and Children
Encourage them to understand and accept their own self-worth. Reinforce their value as a being rather than a “doing,” as some say—in other words, make sure they know that they are valuable for who they are, not what they do. Showing a teen unconditional love (if you’re a parent, family member, or very close friend) or unconditional respect and positive regard is the best way to teach him self-worth.
If you show a teenagers or children that you love and appreciate them for exactly who and what they are, they will learn that it’s okay to love themselves for exactly who and what they are. If you demonstrate that they don’t need to achieve anything to earn your love and respect, they’ll be much less likely to put unnecessary parameters on their own self-love and self-respect.
Sure, we can set goals for them like passing the exam or cleaning their rooms etc. but never make them feel as if they are worthless if they don’t achieve these goals.
How to Increase Self-Worth and Self-Value in Adults (Ourselves)
It’s a bit trickier to increase self-worth and self-value in adults, but it’s certainly not a lost cause.
First, take a look back at the list of what does not determine self-worth. Remind yourself that your bank account, job title, attractiveness, and social media following have nothing to do with how valuable or worthy a person you are.
It’s easy to get caught up in chasing money, status, and popularity—especially when these things are highly valued by those around us and by society in general—but make an effort to take a step back and think about what truly matters when determining our worth: kindness, compassion, empathy, respect for others, and how well we treat those around us.
Second, work on identifying, challenging, and externalizing our critical inner voice. We all have an inner critic that loves to nitpick and point out our flaws. It’s natural to let this inner critic get the best of us sometimes, but if we let him win too often he starts to think that he’s right. Challenge that voice and ask yourself whether the whispers of your inner voice is fact or just assumption and blame.
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