“Sam! It’s your first Ramadhan, aren’t you excited?” Fatima asked, looking at me faced flushed with excitement.

Fatima grew up an orphan and as an adult, she lived alone. On the day I took my shahadah I moved in with her. She took me under her wing as she taught me to pray, memorise surahs as well as correcting me as I began my journey into Islam. It had been a few months since I had taken my shahadah and now my very first Ramadhan was upon us.

“Fatima, I’m extremely excited, but I am nervous. What if we miss suhoor, will I be able to not eat all day?”

“Listen here Sam as a born Muslim we have that same fear, and I’m sure each of us has sometimes missed a suhoor or two, and we did we still survive the day.” “Remember that fasting is for the pleasure of Allah and your intentions speak volumes.”

To be honest, it was not an easy transition, but I found that I was beginning to feel more at ease with all the changes that I have had to make. I had come to trust in Allah and that he had a plan.  Allah is As Salaamu the giver of peace.

That night I lay awake, terrified that if I fell asleep, I would miss my first suhoor! At 2 am I woke Fatima up.

“Sam it’s 2 am go back to bed, if we eat now, we will both be starving by 8 am”, Fatima scolded sleepily. “Can you, for once, just go to sleep, please!”

Well, I was wide awake, might as well use the time to brush up on my Qur’an recitation.  I sat diligently reciting the lesson that Fatima had given to me earlier.  I prayed until my eyes felt heavy, but I was too afraid to miss Suhoor.

Eventually, Fatima emerged half asleep, and we prepared the suhoor. My very first suhoor and Ramadan and I found comfort in the knowledge that 1400 years ago my beloved Nabi of Allah and the children of Ebrahim (peace and blessing be upon them) did the same.

Fatima proceeded to recite the intention to begin the fast and I followed suit.  It was my very first fast, and I was very emotional.

Of all the people in the office, I had judged Fatima the most and yet it was her kindness that had led me to my peace and contentment. No one else took the time to tell me about their religion.  No one took the time to help me when I had panic attacks at the office as I felt lost in the world.

One afternoon Fatima assisted me through a panic attack by comforting me as she taught me that dhikr, particularly saying Allah is sufficient, would help me during my panic attacks.

Something so simple yet so effective gave me much comfort.