Mumtaz Moosa Saley
We reach the halfway mark with tired minds and bodies but heightened spirits.
Ahmed has occupied himself with some DIY work around the house and I lay on the sofa dreading the thought of another iftaar preparation. The peace and quiet was shattered as the very bored children decide to help their Dad and well we all know the outcome of that! Having nagged for about 10 minutes, the last response sent them crying and sulking to their rooms.
After consoling my two little ones, who remain sulking in their rooms, I made my way to the kitchen to begin the food preparations for the evening meal. As I placed a large bowl on the countertop, I decided instead to order a pizza. Today, I’d be spending time with my children.
“Listen I am sorry, my anger got the best of me,” I said to the kids. Mohammed looked up almost confused. I hugged them both and said let’s go play a game.
“Ummi, I really like that you have apologised to me;” Mohamed said. I was curious as to why it would be so and decided to carry on the conversation.
“Ummi, adults never apologise to kids when they are wrong, nor do they give us a reason. They just seem to shout. I know you get frustrated as you are so busy but we also need to know why we are wrong. “Most times I am confused as to what I did when I’m being shouted at.”
Mohamed’s response was quite deep and left me amazed and very remorseful. As adults, we are guilty of the charge made by my son. It’s easier to lose one’s patience than to take a moment and turn a situation into one of setting an example or nurturing through teaching.
I left the children and decided to share the conversation with Ahmed. “I think you should apologise to the children.” Ahmed, like me, was surprised and said he felt a little ashamed of his reaction.
As the children helped to get the table ready, Amina trying her best to carry as much as she could handle in her little hands, made me realise that as parents our duty and obligation to teach our children to be understanding and the best manners.
Ahmed chose that moment to apologise to them leaving Mohamed confused and unsure on how to react. Then, his face lit up as he rushed to his father and embraced him.
Before I had children, I had a million ideologies on their upbringing. Something as simple as an apology brought home the values of child rearing in Islam and I remembered the stories I had heard about the Prophet (PBUH) and his love, mercy and kindness toward children. I saw the wisdom in his teachings today.
As I prayed, I asked Allah to keep my children rightly guided and to give Ahmed and I the ability to nurture our children in the best way possible.
Today was a good day with a lesson that made me realise that Allah is Al-Azeem the Magnificent one. Allah provides us with bounties and those who He chooses to guide, He sends them trials and tribulations.
His wisdom is always to bring us closer to Him and when we realise that all happens by His will we are empowered.
Being accountable is important if we want to achieve Jannah. We need to fulfil our Fardh acts but we also need to take into account our actions daily so we learn not to commit the same wrongs and also make amends for the those we do commit.